Should Statements
Should statements involve motivating oneself, or judging others, with rigid rules built around 'should,' 'shouldn't,' 'must,' and 'ought,' as though punishment were required before anything could reasonably be expected. Directed at oneself, the emotional consequence is typically guilt; directed at others, it tends to produce anger, frustration, and resentment. This pattern has also been given the informal name 'musterbation,' by the psychotherapist who developed rational emotive behaviour therapy.
Illustration
Kept waiting fifteen minutes past his appointment time, a man fumes to himself that his doctor 'should be more considerate' and 'shouldn't ever run this late,' growing increasingly resentful, without pausing to consider that the delay might reflect an emergency with another patient.
References
- Casey, P. & Kelly, B. (2019). Fish's Clinical Psychopathology, 4th ed. Appendix II, 'Defences and Distortions'.